Manifesting happiness can seem to be a huge challenge for some of us. So I think, with some loving support, through gentle reminders we can meet this challenge together.
There is never a “good time” to be happy. Bargaining, such as “when I achieve this goal”, or “as soon as I can achieve this thing”, or “until he/she does/says…”, only sets us up for failure. Those ideas are simply trumped up excuses to never be happy.
The simplicity of being happy is that it is a choice. I know that for some reading these words, there are internal voices that immediately jump up to say, “That’s not true! We can’t control how we feel!”, or some such nagging negative push back. I understand, I used to believe that too. But then I came to my senses in a moment of clarity, and everything in my world changed before my eyes.
I came to the realization that I was no longer satisfied waiting for all the pieces to fall into place, I wanted to stop feeling helpless and hopeless, I wanted to stop waiting for the perfect ideal thing to click into place before I let myself be happy. I no longer wanted to be in my own way. So, I made one choice to move away from those feelings. I didn’t choose to be happy at first, not exactly.
First, I made the decision to show myself as much love and compassion as I felt I showed to other people. I showed myself kindness, and talked myself out of some really dark moods by hearing myself speak of it out loud, and then listening as though it were my best friend talking, and whatever advice I’d give to them, I’d take. It worked great! Though, I admit, is not a technique that works for everyone, but it did work for me.
Second, once I realized that I had stopped being a victim (I didn’t realize that I had made myself one until I stopped being one – another moment of clarity), I suddenly understood what it meant to choose to be happy. Beyond initial reaction to events out of our control and behaviors of others, we have the choice to remain angry, sad, frightened, satisfied, and happy. We make choices all day, every day, and we decide how we handle things.
It helps to consciously make these decisions, and to understand why. Our subconscious minds are always at work doing things that our conscious minds know nothing about. Because of this, if we allow ourselves to live in negativity for a long time, it can seem like a daunting task to change it around to the positive. Maybe even seems impossible – a word I do my best not to use.
But it is possible to work from the outside in. Sometimes it’s the ONLY way to get through to the root of a problem. By verbalizing intentions, we manifest our desires. “Today, I choose to be happy.” Say that a few times to yourself. Close your eyes, see yourself smiling, maybe even laughing, for no reason in particular. “Today, I choose to be happy…today, I choose to be happy… ” Then be sure to allows yourself to feel it. Let that secret smile appear on your face.
When we verbalize our worries on a regular basis, when we discuss our unhappiness and dissatisfaction with our circumstances, when we focus our attention on our fears and failures, we are asking for more of the same. We see the negative in everyone and everything, when the truth is, it’s our own filters, our own negative outlook that is keeping us unhappy.
When we talk about happiness, we attract it. When we talk about success, we see more opportunities to be successful, when we spend our time and energies to positive ideas, things fall into place for us naturally and easily because we are looking through a positive filter.
When we make the choices, are we actually changing the world at large? Not really. The traffic will still be slow during rush hour, the line at the bank or the market will still be long. The kids will still be loud, the neighbors might still be rude. But when we choose to be happy, those unpleasant things don’t seem so bad.
And we mustn’t stop there – at the end of the day, closing in gratitude for the positive things we’ve manifested just reminds us on our way to sleep that things are not negative or bad. To count our blessings is to create room for more.
The best part about choosing to be happy is that it genuinely has a positive effect on others we come into contact with. Maybe we meet someone feeling grumpy, or maybe they take out some of their unhappiness on us. We don’t have to take it personally. Chances are they have shown the same to most people they meet, and been met with the same in return from most others they interact with.
But when we remember for a moment what it feels like to be on the other side of that feeling and show them a smile, offer a kind word, or make a compassionate gesture, even if they never acknowledge it, it’s more likely they’ll remember our kindness, and perhaps even inspire them to choose to let more light into their lives.
Most of all, when we choose to be happy, we are choosing to truly live. We are choosing to live in the moment. We even have countless opportunities to make this choice over and over again throughout the day. Tell yourself, “it’s a beautiful day, and I’m going to shine like the sun! Today I radiate happiness!” However you word your intention is fine. Happiness is a worthy choice, regardless of circumstances. So, get out there and live a happy life, you deserve it!
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